Scanner Slow night, not much doing. Diet Mountain Dew in the cup holder, the red kind. Still getting to know him, seems alright. Only problem is he’s a Cubs fan. Go Cards. Had to feel him out at first on that. These younger guys, it’s all that woke shit now. But one night, under his breath. I said Don’t you ever say that again… with the radio on. God did we laugh. Been a hell of a lot more fun since then. I grew up in this town. We used to have keggers at Lincoln’s tomb. How can I be racist? Ever been out there? Worth seeing. My son wanted to know if he was such a good man why’d somebody shoot him. Yeah I have two now. Hopefully. There was a time there I wasn’t being all that careful. Oh she sets the sprinkler wagging and they’re entertained for hours. White feet blinking, covered in eyelashes of grass. She ran to fat after the second one but what’re you gonna do. I can think of a few things. There was this girl used to tease me mercifully. Mercilessly. You know what I mean. She used to lean forward and blow on my neck. What I wouldn’t do now to feel her breath. Naw, she moved to Texas. Craziest thing though - she hit me up on Facebook last week. I used to get my hair cut there, or was it there? Can’t tell anymore. This whole town has gone to shit. You ever think of leaving? Yeah but where would I go? Call coming in. Someone saw something. Breaking fucking news. Take a spin over there, check it out. What the hell else do we have to do? Is it this one here? Odd addies are on this side buddy. Anybody home? Nobody seems to be. Knock my knuckles raw knocking, god damn. And I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll… Never let the piggies in. Her first mistake. Scratch that. Her first was to call. About damn time. What seems to be the matter, ma’m? Is that right? Is that your car in the driveway? It isn’t? Well whose is it then? You don’t know. Flashlights at their shoulders now big as pepper grinders at some bumfuck Olive Garden. Can we come in? Course we can. You just rent, we live here. Well if this isn’t a shithole. Fire hazard, more like. What’s she doing? Looking for something. What all’s in that purse? Her life. Let’s do one thing at a time, shall we? Show me that ID and then we’ll look at your paperwork. What’s she doing now? Says she’s got something on the stove. You better not, I’ll shoot you in your fucking head. Drop the fucking pot! Shots fired. Drop the fucking pot! Fuck. See that? It’s already all the way at my feet. I'll run and get my kit. It's too late for that. Shit.
Damn, Austin. Well done. That cop has been charged. You got inside the banal humanity of it. Love the grassy feet.